“Transmission from Existence” Poem

I’ve mentioned before how I didn’t like my poetry professor right? Well, again, I DONT LIKE MY POETRY PROFESSOR. Actually, scratch that out now. I DON’T LIKE MY POETRY PROFESSOR.

Today, I think I earned respect from him, thus making me like him a little more. Last two poems I have written have been very abstract and void of extreme literal life changing meaning like he strongly believes every poem must hold–until now. After the poem I turned in this week, he surprised me with such wonderful praise, I was shocked! I feel so good that I could get him to understand that poems can be wonderful without having to hold greater meaning, or has to be a giant metaphor. Hearing him say that my poem was “beautifully written” makes me feel accomplished. I am glad now he is more open to my interpretation of poetry, and in tern he has become less literal while critiquing my other classmate’s work as well.

I thought I’d share my poem, since I usually don’t share them much. So yup, here it is—-

m

Transmission from Existence: Day 84

I saw galaxies kiss
as gentle as evening fog
hovering around petals
of an unsuspecting flower-
I thought this was life.

Their stars like golden swirls
caught in a vortex
planets dancing
small orbs of crystals
Two galaxies gliding
like whispering flames
and from my vessel
I deteriorate like snow flakes
breath by breath.

My home once bathed by sun
now battered with battleships
as if meteors tore them apart
and not the silver of bullets.

My memories dripping tears
and the frailties of humanity
my name my age my skin
are all given to dust
I try to make these
reminiscences gleam
but I’m a painted reality
a smear of human existence.

I saw galaxies kiss
then embrace with such vigorous force
their bodies clashing together
exploding with the sheer bliss
of coming across one another
and they destroy themselves
with kisses hugs and in the end tears
toiling in curls of light
fireworks for the gods
falling into the black hole of time-
I am silenced, forever.

—————————————————-

This is the result of a writing prompt we did in class. He said just to write about “space, stars, milky way, aliens”. Everyone in the class talked about  Star Wars, Milky Way candy bars, or using space as an allusion to something else. Ofcourse, I had to be the one to come up with the morbid sad poem about a girl lost in space. >.< Will I never know happy poems? I guess that is my new personal goal, a happy poem!

Maybe this poetry class isn’t so bad. It does have my brain ticking again with overdramatic and overfantasized language once again. Anywho, going to work on yet another new craft form I’m taking on. I’m actually almost done and I started early today, maybe tomorrow I’ll share.

🙂  Super happy poetry inspired Millie,
Signing off.

*End Transmission*

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9 thoughts on ““Transmission from Existence” Poem

  1. I like how you wrote an actual story instead of falling back on pop culture. It’s very vivid, a bit sad, true, but that’s okay–I tend to write depressing poems too. XD I think that I’m usually too comfortable when I’m happy to write something strong, or I think it sounds fluffy and silly. . . and strong emotions like sadness or regret are easy for the reader to feel. . . .

    I’m looking forward to your next post!

    • Thank you 🙂
      I feel that way about happy poems too. I try but they come off as cheesy or not very meaningful as poems about loneliness, fears, ect. I evny those who can write beautiful love poems >.<

      Do you write poems often? 🙂

      • You’re welcome!

        Yes, exactly! I wonder why it’s easier to write about sad things. . . ?

        I also envy people who can write love poems. They make it seem so easy!

        I took a ancient literature class last year, and we ended up writing a lot of poems. I was hooked. >.< These days I mostly write songs, but it's pretty much the same concept, no?

  2. Hi Millie — I liked your poem. It did have meaning, and depth, and poignancy, but also was understandable and the narrative was clear. A little “mini-story,” which is actually my favorite type of poetry. Where are you taking the poetry class? Do you mind sharing the name of your professor? (You can email me privately with that info.)

    Good work!

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